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From section 7, Dementia and Death, of Saltian
Circles
By Alice Shapiro
She’s ninety-two
and sad to say
discredits every knock
and friendship
at the door.
She’s sure, as if
still six in years
loving her kaleidoscopic eyes
in pretty mirrors
that hate won’t harm.
All reality out of proportion
backwards
like her view
untouched by Death’s immanence
she demands perfection.
It is I who sees
the judgment
my eye discerning
discontent, the hurt
that her old heart embraces
and I forbid myself
this poor future
announce to you
such foolish trend
so that if and when I reach
her long-lived end
at least you will have heard of
frailty
and might forgive an aged parent’s
petty flaw.
Critique
By Dr. David Axelrod
My mother by starting with “my” I am prepared for the shift to “I” below…
is ninety-two
and discredits
every knock
and friendship
at the door.
When young
it was loving,
kaleidoscopic eyes I’m setting up a “then/now” thing with little adjustments to make it flow
in pretty mirrors
that hate could
not harm.
Now, death’s
immanence
demands perfection
and she can’t see
the hurt her old
heart embraces.
I forbid myself
this future, or
so intend, but
if I reach her
long-lived end This is a doubly good ending as it gives and asks forgiveness!
forgive an aged (I speeded it up a bit to make it end more dramatically.)
parent’s petty flaw.
A lovely poem! Hooray for Alice!
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Dr. David B Axelrod is an author and sponsor of international writers’ programs covering dozens of countries and nearly 40 languages. He has presented as an author and educator globally. Dr. Axelrod is a student of 10 languages and author of 19 books and hundreds of articles. He is the only American to receive 2 back-to-back Fulbright Awards in separate areas (poet-in-residence in Yugoslavia and professor of American literature in Macedonia). With the award of his third Fulbright he became the first poet to be formally acknowledged as American Poet-in-Residence in the People’s Republic of China. Dr. Axelrod is the founder and vice president for Florida programs of Writers Unlimited Agency and he is founder and director of Creative Happiness Institute, Inc. For more information, visit his website, PoetryDoctor.org.
